Archive for the ‘All TheWoodChips’ Category


Old People Drinking

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody and Mimosa the bartendress at the Bark ‘n Barley Bar.  A news reporter is talking on the TV on the wall. News Reporter: A recent university study concludes that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. Woody: They need it. [...]

Read More...

There Are Facts And Then There Are Facts

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody and WC Tree having a brew together at the Bark ‘n Barley Bar:  Hillary Clinton is on the TV screen. Hillary: It’s a fact that we were so poor that the Bank of Arkansas came over and repossessed the free calendar they gave us at the county fair… Woody: I’m always [...]

Read More...

Mimosa’s Bartending Tips

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Mimosa in the Bark ‘n Barley Bar, with an open bottle of wine, demonstrating how to enjoy it. Mimosa: The secret to enjoying a good wine is simple… Step 1: Open the bottle to allow it to breathe.  Step 2: If it doesn’t look like it’s breathing, give it mouth to mouth [...]

Read More...

WC Tree Has Money Regrets

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: WC Tree and Woody down at the Bark ‘n Barley Bar talking. WC Tree: I spent ninety percent of my money on wine, women and song… and basically just wasted the other 10 percent.

Read More...

Putting Things In The Same Place

Setting: Elmer and Maple are in the kitchen,  Elmer is looking for the bowl – which is right in front of him. Elmer: Where’s the bowl? Maple (pointing right at it and talking to her girlfriend on the phone, saying: Sorry, I had to fin all of the things that were in plain sight for [...]

Read More...

Trouble Finding Things

Setting: Elmer and Maple are in the kitchen,  Elmer is looking for the bowl – which is right in front of him. Elmer: Where’s the bowl? Maple (pointing right at it and talking to her girlfriend on the phone, saying: Sorry, I had to fin all of the things that were in plain sight for [...]

Read More...

The Presidential Debates – Key Question

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Elmer watching Presidential debate moderator announcing key debate question for the night.

Read More...

Don’t Worry About What People Think

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Captn Stumpy is on the beach with his pirate ship anchored out on

Read More...

The Job Interview Advice

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Maple and Fern are at the office.  Fern looks worried as she is

Read More...

No More Lumps Of Coal For Christmas

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Maple is watching Elmer stuff a solar panel in a stocking.  It’s so big it is

Read More...