Archive for July, 2014


Woody Was Going To Write A Book

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody is at the Bark n Barley Bar talking with bartendress Mimosa. Mimosa: Why are you so down, Woody? Woody: I was going to write a book and be famous. Mimosa: So what happened? Woody: I went to the library and saw that they already have plenty of books.

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It’s More Fun To Be A Pirate…

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Capt’n Stumpy standing on a beach while his sailboat the Shiver Me Timbers is anchored off shore flying a pirates skull and crossbones flag. Capt’n Stumpy: It’s more fun to be a pirate than to join the Navy.

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How Does It Know?

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Cherry is writing in her daily log and journal. Cherry (thinking and writing): Hmmm… so today at scholl my teacher asked what was the greatest invention and I said the THERMOS BOTTLE. Cherry (thinking and writing more): It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold. Cherry: How does it know?

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Oakey Pokey’s Bag Full Of Chickens

Cartoon Dialog:  Setting.  Woody meets Oakey Pokey at a fork in the road.  Oakey is carrying a bag. Woody: What’s in the bag, Oakey Pokey? Oakey Pokey: Chickens Woody: So if I guess how many chickens will you give me one? Oakey Pokey: Shucks, Woody, if you can guess how many chickens, I’ll give you [...]

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Coffee Cream Confusion

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody just finished a brew at the Bark n Barley Bar and thinks he needs some coffee. Woody: Hey Mimosa, I’ll have a coffee without cream. Mimosa: Sorry, we’re out of cream. Mimsa (thinking): Hmm… but we do have milk. Mimosa: How about a coffee without milk?

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Whatever Happened To “A Chicken In Every Pot”

Cartoon Dialogue: Setting: Woody and W.C. Tree at the Bark n Barley Bar.  A Hillary Clinton-like person talking on the bar TV. Hillary-like person:  …and we were so poor that the Arkansas Bank came over and repossessed the Free calendar they gave us at the county fair… Woody:  What ever happened to politicians promising “A [...]

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