OMG! We Need Another Government

Maple is beginning to think we need a new government.
Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Maple and Elmer are watching legislation being passed in Washington D.C.

Senator: All in favor of the Omnibus Resolution for Perpetual War, Health Care Clarification Act (with 12,347 new rules), Freedom To Pilfer IRA Retirement Savings Act, the new Anticipated Dividend / Capital Gains Tax, Citizen’s Email Seizure Bill… hmmm… and funding Senator BlunderBum’s Grease My Campaign Contributors New Bridge To Nowhere Earmark… say Aye.

Maple: Oh My God!!!  We need another government just to protect us from our current government.

Have You Noticed This About Your Underwear

As you get older have you noticed this about your underwear.

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: June Nipper standing with her guitar and a drink, asking a question.
June Nipper: Have you noticed as you get older that your underwear creeps up on you…
June continues: … and you kind of like it.

I think this would make a funny birthday card, don’t you?

Vegetarian Is Just An Old Indian Phrase

A lively discussion about being a vegetarian in the Bark n Barley Bar.

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Mimosa, Woody and an Indian are in the Bark n Barley Bar.  Woody is eating a giant cheeseburger.
Mimosa: Woody, you shouldn’t eat that, it has a lot of fat in it.  You should be a vegetarian and get healthy.
Woody: Vegetarian!   Yechhh!  I’ll never give up my carnivorous ways.
Indian: Yeah, right, Woody!  Vegitarian is just an old Indian word for BAD HUNTER.

Just Exactly What Is A STRATEGY, Joe?

President Obama seems a bit confused about what a strategy is...

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: The White House.  President Obama and Vice President Joe are talking.
President Obama: Just exactly what is a STRATEGY, Joe?  Is it a fund raising technique… or maybe a new way to use my teleprompter… or what???
Vice President Joe: Hmmm… not sure where to begin with this one, Chief…

TRIBUTE TO FRANCE! J’aime le barbecue le plus …

This month, WoodChips subscribers in France viewed the WoodChips site more than any other non-US country.  So in a tribute to them, we created this cartoon in French.

And it seems to be a nice French sentiment, and one of mine as well.  Now, you have to be careful with translations, I mean, this may mistakenly say something like “Dan stuck a carrot in his ear,” so read with a grain of salt.

Click here for the English translation... or what I think it says (chuckle).

J'aime le barbecue le plus ...

That’s Why The Boss Makes The Big Bucks!

That's why the Mr. BigTwig the boss makes the big bucks.

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Maple has just entered Mr. BigTwigs office.  Behind his desk, Mr. BigTwig has a poster on the wall that says, TEAMWORK – A bunch of people doing what I say.
Maple: So what do you want to do boss?
Mr. BigTwig: Well, there a re a couple of things… so let’s start with one and then finish up with the other.
Maple: Wow, that’s why you get paid the big bucks.

You Know You Are Drunk When…

You know you are drunk when... W. C. Tree explains to Woody how you know you are drunk.

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody and W. C. Tree are having brews down at the Bark n Barley Bar.
W. C. Tree: Drunk is when you feel SOFISSCATED… but can’t pronounce it.
Woody: Good to know, W. C.

Surprising Federal Reserve Announcement – Go Figure

A puzzling announcement from the Federal Reserve - go figure.

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Elmer is watching the news on TV;  He almost spills his brew with the surprising announcement from the chairman of the Federal Reserve.

Announcer: Breaking news… in testimony before Congress, the Federal Reserve Chairman just stated that… “There is NO INFLATION, although prices inexplicably continue to rise.”

Woody Was Going To Write A Book

Woody was going to write a book.

Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody is at the Bark n Barley Bar talking with bartendress Mimosa.
Mimosa: Why are you so down, Woody?
Woody: I was going to write a book and be famous.
Mimosa: So what happened?
Woody: I went to the library and saw that they already have plenty of books.

It’s More Fun To Be A Pirate…

It's More Fun To Be A Pirate
Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Capt’n Stumpy standing on a beach while his sailboat the Shiver Me Timbers is anchored off shore flying a pirates skull and crossbones flag.
Capt’n Stumpy: It’s more fun to be a pirate than to join the Navy.