Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody is at the Bark ‘n Barley Bar talking with bartender Mimosa. Morgan Freeman is on the bar TV doing his Discovery Channel show.
Morgan Freeman: …and now we return to my Discovery Channel program… Through The Wormhole…
Mimosa: Oh My God! I just love Morgan Freeman’s deep, rich voice!
Woody: Yeah, if I just had his deep voice with my good looks…
Mimosa: Then you’d just have his deep voice!
Note that I got the idea for this cartoon from a funny Twitter post by James Altucher, author of Choose Yourself, and other excellent books. I have read two of them, Choose Yourself and Choose Yourself Guide To Wealth. Both my copies are dog-eared and heavily underlined. You may gather from this fact that James is chock full of good ideas and I recommend his books…. oh, and he’s funny too.
You can learn more about James and his books here at http://www.jamesaltucher.com/books/.
Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Woody is at the Bark n Barley Bar. His arm is in a sling. Mimosa and June Nipper are behind the bar. June has her traditional guitar and martini balanced on the end of it.
Woody: OUCH!!! I broke my arm riding a motorcycle.
June Nipper: Hey, I’m not the kind of gal to say I told you so… but if I was, I’s really, really be saying it now.
Woody: Gee, thanks for your kind restraint.
Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Cherry is writing in her daily log.
Cherry Writes (thinking): I think all you really need in life is a friend with chocolate.
Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Maple is at her PC writing a Dear Santa letter. Elmer is watching, scratching his head as he stands by the Christmas Tree with gifts under it.
Maple (typing): Dear Santa, This year please give me a big fat bank account and a slim body. And please, don’t mix those two up like you did last year. Sincerely, Maple EveryGreen.
Caption: Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring…
They were all on their iPhones.
Cartoon Dialog: Setting: Mimosa, Woody and the Indian are at the Bark n Barley Bar. Woody looks pretty messed up with his arm in a sling.
Mimosa: What happened to you, Woody?
Woody: I have so many problems I don’t know where to start.
Mimosa: Well… that which doesn’t kill you makes you strong.
The Indian: Right, Woody. Hmmm… except for problems with bears. Bears will kill you.
Caption: There is always an exception to the rule.
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