I was flying back to Orlando on Friday after being stranded in St. Louis due to the winter storm that hit Thursday — which had caused my flight to be canceled.  Lucky for me, I was able to reserve the last available seat on the flight.

You may imagine that the airport was a madhouse — and you would be correct in that thought.

As I was going through the TSA security, a nice, attractive couple was in front of me.  Then, big surprise, for some reason, the woman was pulled aside by the TSA for a thorough search.
Honest to God, I would have never thought her a terrorist, but then I’m just a low life American tax-paying citizen layman when it comes to airport security, so what do I know, really.

As she was being spread eagled and electronically wanded and searched and patted down, I was reassembling all my things, putting my shoes and belt back on, making sure I still had both of my laptops, my iphone, my billfold, my money, my suitcase, my briefcase, my overcoat, my suit coat, my driver’s license, my boarding pass, my sanity and anything else I had disassembled into ten plastic tubs to get through the checkpoint.

As she was cleared, I overheard her husband nearby say, “wasn’t that a wonderful massage, dear.”  My madcap sense of humor kicked into high gear and I looked at her and said, “Do you have a great sense of humor?”

She said yes, so I pulled this WoodChips card out of my pocket and gave it to her and said, “You might like this – because you have just been through it.”

She smiled and took the card and I moved on out of the security area and started walking toward my gate, thinking, gee, I hope her and her husband don’t take offense.  A couple of minutes later, as this thought was starting to pass out of my mind, her husband … hmmm … a rather large guy, approached me.

He had a big grin on his face and said, “That was a great card,” and he thanked me for it.  A bit relieved, I went straight into my 30 second WoodChips elevator speech, although there were no elevators around that I could see, and told him the WoodChips are regularly viewed in 120 countries around the world and to check out the web site if he liked.

He enthusiastically said that he would.

Which just goes to show you that American airports are still really fun places, even with the TSA involved.  Hmmm … or something like that (chuckle).

And maybe you can forward this email to your friends without taking the risk of a black eye like I did.

So keep tuning in to the WoodChips, just in case you see this picture in the future where my madcap sense of humor got me in trouble (you know, like NASCAR followers watch the races for the big accident).

And by all means, have fun and keep smiling – J. Daniel

P.S. Anybody got a steak I can put on this eye ?

P.P.S. You all know this really happened, don’t you.

P.P.P.S. If the couple in line in front of me in St. Louis today will send me an email, they will be listed in the Honorary WoodChips page for their great sense of humor – just email me at jdaniel@thewoodchips.com and put in the subject line “TSA Couple” so I can find it in the thousands of emails we receive here at WoodChips Central.